Friday, September 10, 2010

CSI: Miami - Horatio Caine's Sunglasses Moments

How odd that I basically hate this show but the same cornball moments I loathed it for are the only parts that make it relevant to me. I used to be big on CSI for the first few seasons. Then you just get tired of people dying. Why do people gotta die so much on tv? That's not what I watch tv for, so I can see some fool's dead body on a slab. And when they do die, why can't be it be on The Bacheor?

So I gave CSI: Miami a shot when it first premiered and it blew that shot in my opinion. I even gave it repeat viewers after my initial "WTF is this crap" moment. The cast was inferior and the jokes cornier. I was in utter disbelief when I heard the Miami one was the most popular CSI. HUH? David Caruso is a hack. He's the Nicholas Cage of television. Did he ever show his ass on NYPD Blue like Dennis Franz? Dennis Franz's ass is burned into my brain. I will die and as the montage of my life passes before my eyes, I will see Dennis Franz's ass.

Hey, anyone remember that Tales From the Crypt episode where Whoopi Goldberg cuts off that guy's head because his red hair was so damn valuable? For years I remembered that as being David Caruso. It was actually James Remar a.k.a. Ajax from The Warriors. Too bad it wasn't Caruso. That would've rocked hard.

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